Today I want to talk about timers and how they’ve become one of my favorite parenting tools. How helpful they can be and how I use them. Using timers can help in so many of those tough situations we encounter daily as parents. And it takes the pressure off of you, as parents, and being the “bad guy”.
I had no idea timers would work so good until I used it!
For me, it started on a whim. I didn’t research it or read about it anywhere. But seeing how good it has worked for us I of course want to share it with all the parents I can! It started when we brought our twins home.
Before that day, bedtime was easy for us. Having 2 children 16 months apart is not easy, by any means. Our days were exhausting and chaotic but we had this amazing bedtime ritual that worked beautifully and ended with our 2 kids in bed by 7pm. I can’t even tell you how wonderful it was to be able to look forward to that no matter how rough our day was.
Plus, my husband and I always knew we would have our evenings together (the nights he was off, anyway). We would eat dinner, just the 2 of us, watch a movie or show, or even play beer pong and usually laugh our asses off. That time for us was so important and made it so easy to keep our relationship strong through all the stress that comes with having babies so close together.
Once we brought the twins home and officially had 4 kids under 4 under 1 roof, there was quite a bit of adjusting that had to take place. Everything was different, starting with that very first night. Our oldest son, who was 2 at the time, refused to go to bed! For the first time ever! I didn’t even know how to handle it! The thought of losing our beautiful and easy bedtime and not having the evenings to recoup from the hectic day literally terrified me!
The moment I discover timers as a parenting tool!
I can’t tell you why, it just came out, I said “Ok, buddy, I’ll give you 5 more minutes to play. I’m going to set the timer, when you hear that beeping, it’s time for bed.” He responded “OK!” The timer went off and that was that. He knew it was bedtime. He got his few extra minutes to play that he wanted and he was prepared for that beeping. And here we are over 3 years later still using timers for all of our kids! And we use it for just about every pain-in-the-ass situation there is.
Set timers for anything!
We’ve added the bathtime timer. The dinnertime timer. The video game timer. The leaving for school timer. And most recently, we now have a “poop timer”. My 5 year old has been struggling with getting to the potty. Whether it’s because he doesn’t want to stop what he’s doing or just doesn’t want to go. I know it’s not uncommon so I’ve just been trying to help him work through whatever the issue is. I’ve tried everything to get him to go, to no avail. So, finally I decided to try the timer. Since he does so well with them for everything else I figured it was worth a try! I give him a warning that I’m setting it, this way he knows when it beeps it’s time to sit on the potty. And guess what? It’s been working!
He doesn’t always actually “go” but he tries. The best part is, there’s no fight to get him to sit on the potty. And when he does go, he’s so proud! I’m hoping that by turning this into a more positive experience, he’ll just start going on his own. Either way we’ve gone quite a few days with clean undies and for any parent with a kid who struggles with pooping knows, that’s a big win!! Yay for skid-mark free undies!
As you see, you can utilize timers for pretty much any situation your struggling with. Maybe your child has a hard time staying seated for meals. Start setting a timer for them. Start small, don’t expect your child to sit for too long. Maybe start with just 5/10 minutes and increase it a little each day. Be clear with them about the timer and what you expect of them. Your kids can understand more than you probably think. I can promise you from my experience, it will help!
Why do timers work so good?
There is a combination of things that make timers work so good. One reason I think timers help is your child understanding what is expected. For some reason, it’s so easy for our kids to say no and fight with us. So instead of it being you repeating yourself 100 times or yelling at them to do something, the timer is dictating what they have to do (they can’t argue with a timer now can they?)
Another big reason is it’s a bit of a compromise. Your child will feel like their feelings are being acknowledged, that goes a long way with little ones! Saying to them “I know it’s hard for you to sit long at the table but you just have to sit and eat as much as you can until the timer goes off” or “I know you don’t want to go to bed just yet, so I’ll give you a few more minutes to play but when the timer goes off, it’s bedtime” They feel as though they are getting their way too. Their feelings are being considered and that really means a lot to toddlers who are just learning that they have feelings and choices.
So, think about the toughest parts of your day with your kids and consider incorporating timers! If you try it, let me know how it goes down in the comments!! If you have any questions about incorporating timers into your daily routines feel free to leave them below, I’m always happy to help!!
